I laugh in the face of a Popsicle

There are few days I would actually like to skip over when they pertain to Lily. The day before her second surgery, I would like to skip that day, her second surgery, that would be another not so pleasant day to skip. Today, would be a marvelous day to skip too.

The good from today, Lily's IRN is up to 1.9, .1 away from where they would like her to be. I would think we would go home Monday but I have a feeling that isn't going to happen because she won't take any of her medicine orally except for her Coumadin which is her anticoagulant. So I guess out of all of them, that is the best one for her to keep down.

On top of her good IRN level, we took out her ART line,which was in her foot. Her CVP line also what I refer to as the IJ on my Facebook statuses, is still in the side of her neck. We have to keep that until later tonight. They are trying to put a new IV line in but that has been crazy heck. As to the reason I would like to strike this day out..skip over it. Lily has bad veins, or ones that like to play Marco and never yell polo. After 4 or 5 tries it was called quits, this was after they brought in the vein finder (don't ask me the real name for the thing, we will go with my non-medical term, sounds good) Poor Scott and Josie held her down while Laurel and I tried to calm her by talking to her and bribing her with anything from Popsicles to a new Barbie from Andrea's Closet. Needless to say, nothing worked, she screamed, she poured sweat, and she was overly worked to the point of where she was coughing and gagging. We all said enough was enough, and went to work cleaning her up.

My 23 month old daughter looks like she has either been beaten or tried to shoot up a few times. I know both of those sound horrible, but she has bruises every where. All over her thighs, her wrists, her arms, feet, it is awful. Then on top of all of this, she had an allergic reaction to the tape that was covering the dressings on her chest along with the tape around her IJ. It's awful, you see her scratch it, and as much as you try to stop her you can't help but want to let her itch it because you know if it were you, you would be cursing up and down at the madness of it all. So after a bath, we changed her bedding then got her some benadryl, now she sleeps so precious, so sound, so comfortable. I am at my wits end, I just want to scoop her up and run out of here, want to take her away from all the pokes, from all the pain, just take her home and let her sleep in her own bed. As we all know, that can't happen, this is all for her own good, and no amount of my protection is going to make this magically go away and be fixed. It all takes time, she has to heal, it is a slow process, and as much as it hurts me to watch her go through this, she has to in order to recover to come home. Just a little bit long, that is what I keep telling myself. Just a little bit longer, then we will be in our car, waving good-bye at the hospital and watching it get smaller in the rear-view mirror while heading home. She looks great, just a few tweaks need to occur, then I think her and I are both ready to hit the road.....just a few more days....just a little bit longer....

I think I am with Lily, Mommy needs a nap also, I think my brain is on overload. I will take some pictures today, I have been seriously behind.

Love, Hugs and Blessings
Jenna